Wow all that was so good to get out. I am a huge fan of writing, not only does it help me personally but I truly believe it can help others. I want to start this post by saying that there is not another religion that I would want to be part of than be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints. Like if I walked away it would not be to jump onto another ship. I also feel that I need to point out that I do not feel that any prophet or his apostles have taught things wrong, my understanding could have been wrong. I believe that I naturally have anxieties that are magnified with things I hear members say, it might be comments shared in or out of church or it might be a teacher who thinks they got it all right and love hearing themselves talk. We are all given agency and we all have the ability to decipher what we hear and apply it or not. Unfortunately I hung too strongly on the teachings and opinions of others to build my belief system. Not to say that what they did to feel close to God was not a great thing for them, but it was not a great thing for me. Example of this, I love animals. They are so precious to me. I can feel God through my sweet dogs stronger than other typical ways of feeling God. I made this comment to a loved one and was told that I was messed up. I wish I knew then what I do now, or had bigger cahonies to say something. We cannot choose how God speaks to our hearts sometimes. I spent awhile thinking I was wrong in feeling Gods presence through animals. But then through my own ponderings and logic I realized that these animals are precious and sacred to God. Why would they be on this earth if not to bring joy and understanding to his children (we just got 2 puppies for our children, and God gave His children pets too LOL)? People search and search for deep teachings when in reality things can be much more simple. I consider it a gift I have to feel God through a creation that cannot even speak. How sad it is to me that some are too narrow minded and closed off and strict with a stick ……(you know where) to even comprehend that perhaps God is capable of speaking to each of us completely different from each other. I have 2 children, boy girl twins actually. I speak to them equal yet very different from the other. Dinosaurs are the way to my sons heart and how he knows I am interested in him and love him when I know the names of his fav dinosaurs. While on the other hand my daughter knows that I love her when I decorate her room with her or take the time to do her hair do requests. So you see, I am thinking that is how God talks to us, equal yet different. It is WHY I do not get that same warm and fuzzy feeling reading scriptures as I get when I am cuddling an animal. And that is ok. I love that my son gets so excited about dinosaurs and that they make him so happy. I love that my daughter loves to decorate her room and make it look beautiful at only 6 years old. Neither is wrong in what brings them joy. If we are meant to learn about God through being parents ourselves then may I suggest that we look closer at WHAT makes our children happy. We can then use this to help them understand their own gifts from God.
My love for animals is actually what lead to the baptism of a coworker. We bonded over talking about dogs, then several years later she called to tell me she was getting baptized and said it all started with me telling her that I believed animals have souls when she asked what I believed. She asked me what my faith was. She is someone I spoke to about twice a year. That’s it. So yes people are watching and listening and I choose to love them and not ask if they’re LDS just because they seem pure. Religion of an individual does not matter at all to me. Something that I am sure members mean no harm in, yet probably offends others is when they ask someone “are you LDS?” I have despised hearing this question for years now. If a person says “yes I am” then I guess it makes the person asking feel safer in the conversation? I have no idea. What do you think the person feels if they are not LDS when they are asked? I feel so bad for the individuals that say “whats that? Or no I am not.” I have never been asked if I was Baptist, or Catholic etc hahahaha and it would make me feel like I couldn’t join the party if someone asked me that. In my previous life before children I had the opportunity to meet a lot of people from all walks of life through my job. I loved meeting new individuals. I would often spend 2-3 days with them every 6 months. As they would get to know me and find out I was from Utah they would ask if I was Mormon. I would happily say “Yes” their response almost every single time was “Well you’re a cool Mormon” hahahaha. I would laugh each time not knowing exactly what they meant. I was even introduced to people they knew like this, “This is Char, she is Mormon, but don’t worry she is cool”. I knew from that moment on that I was going to be watched a little closer, but it did not change the way I did anything, I treat people well because I love them and I love laughing with them. Finally I asked someone who called me a cool Mormon what that actually meant. They told me that the Mormons they had met were judgy and they felt mistreated by them, that they did not feel that they fit in or were good enough, that the Mormons they met felt uptight. I assured the individual that that most definitely was not how Mormons have been taught to treat others and I apologized that that was their experience. Then I kinda wanted to hunt down those Mormons to tell them to stop making a bad name for us “cool Mormons” hahaha. People are precious and ALL of them matter. I know that I am still on a very long journey trying to figure all this church stuff out, but one thing that I DO have figured out and thankfully have for some time is that LOVE is what matters the most. Kindness, LOVE and RESPECT towards others regardless of their beliefs is WHAT matters the most and WHAT will bring them closer to GOD. It is more important that you show KINDNESS than tell your beliefs.
-Peace Out.